PHP is terrible

General Discussion
  • I'm bored. It's 1am. I feel like hating on PHP.

    Java also sucks.

    Terrible languages, both of them.

    They're terrible in different ways, though.

    For Java, it's the stupid syntax and the ridiculous stringency. Java is actually pretty powerful if you can deal with that.

    For PHP, the syntax isn't that bad, but it's slow, bloated, and not very powerful.

  • For java you'd also have the alternative groovy which basically removes the horrible syntax, adds closures (I didn't work with java 8 yet, so it's a comparism to java 7), adds duck-typing if you prefer, and so on 😉 It can compile to Java-Bytecode...
    If the only requirement is to stay on JVM I'd also recommend (even so I didn't work with it on my own) scala since it's a functional language on JVM 🙂

    For PHP the best way is to move to node.js, vert.x (either with js, coffeescript, java or groovy, scala, whatever) or something similar 😄

  • I feel you brother. Don't know much about Java, except to stay away from it. I know some PH though, just enough to realize that it has had it's day. It is time to move on.

    I kind of feel bad about PHP. I like it, in a nostalgic sort of way. I'm big on sentimentalism. I have a Remington model 5 typewriter around for sentimental reasons; I like it, the way it looks, the twang of keys as I try to write something with it. But I don't *actually *write anything substantial on it of course. Maybe an adress on an envelope or something, maybe once a year.

    That is sort of the way I feel about PHP: it was the bomb at one point. But it is becoming increasingly clear that node.js (and perhaps similar technologies) is the way forward. It makes me a little sad, because there is a lot of legacy tech out there, and a LOT to learn for those who just recently mastered PHP. Its like "Hey, I just got here! Do I really have to start *another * marathon right away?"

    Huh. I guess I do. I'm sure it will be a nice run, switching everything I know and have learned over the last decade to node and javascript (and angular I guess). But before I get started on that, I would like to just sit here for a bit and enjoy the view before I get started again, if you know what I mean?
    But I guess there's no time for that. I have to keep moving, keep moving... And in half a decade or so, when I have finally masted that node beast, when all the node.js things like this here forum software will have integers instead of floats as stable version numbers, something completely new and infinitely better will come along.... it will never end.

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