No RTO

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What, you don't remember the Dave incident?

sylver_dragon

I work in cybersecurity. One of our common issues is people getting malware while surfing for porn. I'm willing to bet that it's not all looking and no touching.

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You had me at bathrobe.

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The theory is that if you have time to jack off and still get your work done they must not be giving you enough work.

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Honest lyrics.

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If you mean the stats in the cartoon, those were probably pulled out of the cartoonist's ass cuz it's a cartoon.

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Doesn't matter. If I'm doing my job and doing it well and making the quotas then management can mind their own damn business.

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I hear you, but they take that as proof that their quotas aren't high enough.

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Every day I have to make so many decisions that by Lunch I'd be like "The spirit is willing but the flesh is spongy and bruised"

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Obviously, but the cartoon has a contextual canon, and in that canon management has established a baseline, and continues to take measurement.

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That's not how 'human' works.

Flying Squid

The truth underlying that joke is that you are more productive when you are comfortable and people tend to be most comfortable at home.

Flying Squid

Exactly why drug testing (with exception of stuff like people operating heavy machinery) is bullshit.

If you are working an office job and you want to go into the bathroom and shoot up at lunch but you can still do your job, why should anyone give a shit?

Synapse

Of course there is a non-zero amount of in-office wanking. But how many get measured?

Story time !

I has leaving in flat share with 2 friends while studying master. We all had a 4 month internship in different companies during the summer break (mandatory).
The week back to university after the internships we also also provided temporary shelter to a younger student while she was looking for a new flat. For context, this young lady was raised in a very strict Christian family.
As we were all friends in this flat, we use to cook and eat most meals together.
One evening the topic came up, about how boring the internships were. One friend confessed he was so bored he went to the toilet to masturbate on the job, using his phone for porn. I was like "no way you did !" and the second friend said, "yeah me too, I also had a wank on the job". Out of 3 guys, 2 had a wank on the job in the course of 4 month. Our lady friend was more like "You guys MASTURBATE!?!".

Semi-Hemi-Lemmygod

Obligatory Mitchell & Webb sketch

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Boss makes a dollar

I make a dime

That's why I'm jerkin

On company time.

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you are more productive when you are comfortable

I might argue the real productivity gain is coming from the elimination of the commute. Its less strictly comfort of the home office and more the elimination of the need to travel long distances in a car before and after work. You can "show up" early and "stay late" when its a matter of walking in and out of a room in your house, rather than traveling 20 miles on a packed freeway.

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Exactly why drug testing (with exception of stuff like people operating heavy machinery) is bullshit.

Can't find the context, but there's a one-off line about a small company being bought up by a bigger corporate entity. The CEO was asked about his drug testing policy. He responded, "if we tested our staff then we'd lose half our workforce... and it would be our better half".

On the flip side, I think a lot of the drug culture in the tech, law, and finance sectors is legit horrifyingly toxic. The boozing and bumping and microdosing becomes a way of squeezing extra effort out of your workers, while blunting the immediate consequences of accumulated stress and overwork.

A large population of professions that feel compelled to self-medicate on a regular basis is covering up some deeper chronic physical and psychological problems. Same with the huge swaths of gulf coast and industrial midwest that rolled from oxy to heroin to fent over the last twenty years. Heavy drug use often operates as a whipping boy for more pervasive and insidious social problems - lead poisoning, extreme social anxiety, treatment for PTSD.

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If all you have is a lease, then this is the sunk cost fallacy. Your paying the lease whether you use it or not, so that should not be a factor. Not using it is still cheaper as you do not have the overhead of keeping the space usable (electricity, janitors, etc), and eventually the lease will end. And, you might something else to do with the space that, while not worth the lease, still has non 0 value that you wouldn't get if the space was being used for offices. Besides, at some point the lease would end.

Of course, if your board and executives have investments in commercial real estate, or industries that depend on it (restraunts in commercial areas, supplies of office grade toilet paper, etc), then they have a clear conflict of interest, and may want to sacrifice the interests of the one company to prop up their other investments. In theory, shareholders could sue over this. However, not only would this be very hard to prove, but almost all shareholders have the exact same conflict of interest.

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Most commutes are under half an hour. Comfort over an 8 hour day will have a far greater impact on productivity than not sitting in a car for 25 minutes before you get to work.