Slinky

Dragon Rider (drag)

Jesus was a communist and any Christian who believes the teachings of Jesus is a communist too.

[email protected]

In the new testament, Jesus went and braided a whip out of leather -- a process which takes several hours, meaning this was cold rage and not hot impulse -- and proceeded to thrash the shit out of a bunch of people profiteering off of religion.

[email protected]

Yeah, but they said it like it was an insult.

Dragon Rider (drag)

Well that's because they hate Jesus.

[email protected]

And it's not a very good human suit.

Hanrahan

The guy I read about and the guy they seem to be thinking of are two different people.

I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ - Mohandas Gandhi

[email protected]

It's a fuckin banger of a quote, but I regret to say that thanks to ADHD-fueled scourings of random internet rabbit holes instead of of doing college work, I've read that there's no evidence Gandhi actually said that.

[email protected]

I'm an atheist and basically always have been, but I grew up around some religious people and one thing I've never forgotten was some advice this one guy gave me (8 or 9) and his daughters (8 and 6):

Jesus once whooped the ass of every mother fucker in a church because they were breaking the rules. So if you ever need to ask yourself "What would Jesus do?" never forget that a righteous ass-beating is an option if the situation is severe enough

[email protected]

He also flipped moneychangers tables. He basically sat while fuming, and braided a whip, and then showed the people the proper ending to a Monopoly game.

[email protected]

Some of the people: "But what if they were fundamentally a 'good guy?'"

Me: "Did I stutter‽‽‽"

[email protected]

The other guy that they are listening to, who definitely wasn't named "Brian."

[email protected]

Same, dude.

It’s important to remember the actual teachings of Jesus in the Bible. These fuckers call themselves Christians but the fact is, most of them don’t know the first thing about what was written.

I’m not even sure he existed but I’ll be damned if I’m not going to spin that around. Especially once you get into the unpublished shit.

JaggedRobotPubes

This is really really well put!

[email protected]

It's not that they were breaking the rules, it's that they were preying on vulnerable people.
If you want to talk about Jesus' relationship with rules, look at the people he chose to spend time with -- outcasts and social undesirables. Rulebreakers.
And look at his response to the question about which commandment was the most important: "If you thought it was about the rules, you missed the point".

[email protected]

The proper ending to a Monopoly game is to switch the rules to "Prosperity" mode and play again.

[email protected]

Right? This is a proper human suit.

[email protected]

That's The Landlord's Game. I was specifically referring to just Monopoly.

[email protected]

Why the fuck are people still talking about Jesus?

[email protected]

And every so often you still get young men trying to cleanse the temple mount by force of arms. Talk about starting a trend.

NιƙƙιDιɱҽʂ

Because he's one of the biggest, most well-known figures on the planet regardless of whether or not you believe in him?