A coworker of mine years ago once said of James Earl Jones’s voice, “When he says ‘This…is CNN,’ you think to yourself, ‘Oh my GOD, it is, why did I never think about that??!?”
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This is James Earl frigging Jones. •The• voice. Stuttered. His whole life. Poetry and acting helped him speak.
We judge people impulsively and •incredibly• harshly by how they speak: a stutter, an accent, a dialect, how they make a certain sound, how they sound.
In honor of James Earl Jones, let’s all just try to find that judgement within ourselves, grab it with both hands, and yank it out. I know I’ll try.
/end
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P.S. Some quick advice if you’re talking to a person who stutters:
Relax. Be patient. Don’t rush them. Don’t be anxious for them. Don’t “help” them by completing their word for them. (It’s NOT helpful!) If a stutter starts, let them find their own way through it. Chill. You’re good. It’s all good. Show them you’re listening and attentive, and you don’t mind them taking the time they need. Give them your patience, your attention, and your acceptance.
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Paul Cantrellreplied to Paul Cantrell last edited by [email protected]
(The above is paraphrased from my speech-language pathologist spouse, who I would like you to know kicks a whole lot of ass)
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@inthehands I don't suppose your spouse has their own Mastodon account I could follow? (kidding / not kidding)
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@inthehands I feel like this is great advice for speaking with most people, regardless of whether they stutter or not
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Griz, Some Guy on Mastodonreplied to Paul Cantrell last edited by
Regarding James Earl Jones, and his road. RIP.
There are some great voices who might never be heard. Who were pointed at, and laughed at, and ridiculed. and thought not good enough for the one thing they love to do.
If that's you -- whatever your "voice" is -- keep going anyway. You might not get on The Big Stage. But you're already there. Tricky bit is convincing other folks you are.
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@inthehands does she have advice for the stutterers?
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@inthehands it's good advice.
As a stutterer who was bullied for it as a kid, I'm no longer recognisable as a "stutterer", but every so often I pause while I think of a different way of saying "the word I'm going to stutter if I attempt it", and it bloody infuriates me when people use that tiny, half a second pause in my speech to jump in and interrupt.
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Lucie Tronvert 🍋🟩replied to NeonSnake last edited by
omg this
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Krystal (Beautiful Sky)replied to Paul Cantrell last edited by
@[email protected] as someone who has a stutter that only shows up when she's anxious: this. All of this. I love my partners that much more when they see me quietly stammering, trying to express some need that scares me, and they all stop talking until I'm finished. Last time, they all got the other people in the room to stop talking too.
- posted by Beautiful Sky -
Paul Cantrellreplied to Kate Zimmerman last edited by
@kzeta
Nah, she’s way too busy (and maybe too wise) to spend her time on social media like all of us fools here! But if she ever makes one, I’ll make sure you’re the first to know. -
@mdione
That’s a whole job there! It’s tricky because the causes and mechanisms of stuttering are poorly understood, and different things help different people. Working with a professional is the way, if one has access.Some resources:
Speech, Language, Swallowing, and Hearing Information and Resources
The American Speech-Language-Hearing Association is committed to ensuring that all people with speech, language, and hearing disorders receive services to help them communicate effectively.
American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (www.asha.org)
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Paul Cantrellreplied to Lucie Tronvert 🍋🟩 last edited by
@lucie_tronvert @neonsnake
To be fair, I do not stutter, and that hijack-in-the-pause also drives •me• nuts! I can hardly imagine what it feels like with the social-emotional complications of a dIsfluency layered on top. -
Paul Cantrellreplied to Krystal (Beautiful Sky) last edited by
@sky
It feels so good to be heard, and to be valued so much that people will create space for one to be heard. -
dimsumthinkingreplied to Paul Cantrell last edited by
@inthehands isn’t this good advice for listening to anyone?
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Paul Cantrellreplied to dimsumthinking last edited by
@dimsumthinking
It is indeed. -
@neonsnake @inthehands Many moons ago Dick Cavett interviewed the great Jonathan Miller over five nights, who revealed that he was a life-long stutter/stammerer. His strategy was to foresee the word coming up in his sentence that was going to make him pause, and quickly find a synonym that wouldn’t. What a mind.
Anyone who thinks people who stutter are stupid, are stupid.
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@mrpommer @neonsnake
This is called “circumlocution,” and many, many people who stutter do it (including Joe Biden). -
"His strategy was to foresee the word coming up in his sentence that was going to make him pause, and quickly find a synonym that wouldn’t."
That's it, exactly that - I didn't know there was a word for it - "circumlocution", but I'd seen it elsewhere as a tactic. The "half a second pause" is me re-routing the sentence around the word I'm not going to be able to say (largely subconscious at this part in my life).
Funnily enough, one of the times I can come unstuck is when doing presentations, public speeches etc - if I can *literally* see the word coming up (eg. on a card or teleprompter) I'm completely screwed, as it's much harder to re-route - like, it's almost stuck in my brain. I learned to use cue cards of the barest nature pretty quickly; which has the positive knock-on effect of making my presentations seem much more natural and engaging anyway.
I have vague memories of Biden getting stick about using a teleprompter and stumbling (I'm not from the US, so haven't watched many of his speeches etc), which I've an idea was more "stutter" related than anything else.
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Paul Cantrellreplied to NeonSnake last edited by [email protected]
@neonsnake @mrpommer
That’s fascinating that visually seeing the word helps! I’ve heard that lots of different surprising things like that help different people — like for example some people stutter less hearing their own speech played back to them with a slight delay, which makes it •harder• for most people to speak! Brains sure are fascinating.