Big thank you to all the guys at DesignCreatePlay for setting me up
Have to say it runs a lot smoother on your hosting than my test site on another host, I will post a link to the site once we are ready to roll.
So I just built a quick VM locally and followed the guides I mentioned above. Did nothing differently except I didn't install php and apache before and start ripping things out. It works flawlessly. I can only imagine at this point its something with my server and I think I may just wipe it and start clean, using nginx only instead of apache.
Thanks for looking at this stuff guys - I appreciate it.
Edit - welp, it works great now. Probably has this whole time. The URL I was using to hit the forums was set to be x.x.132.x, it had to be x.x.135.x. Hey, at least I learned a TON about nodebb and nginx 🙂 I'll take it.
Bloody hell! I took out the recent replies option on the category causing trouble. I changed it from 2 to 0 and that solved the issue. I was able to activate the category again and everything is back to normal.
I'm guessing the poll was bothering the preview on the homepage.