Just being polite
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Sameisch here, but we don't talk much if i don't want to know how you are doing.
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I actually think it might have more to do with the phrasing. I'm very used to "hey how are you doing" or "you okay?" and the likes.
The important part is that I, and I think most Americans, are used to hearing it as a passive question, with the way your feeling being the last part of the statement.
Hearing "alright dude" randomly would leave me absolutely stumped because even if you have a questioning inflection in your voice, that word combination means "you just did/said something that warranted a sarcastic affirmation" to me
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I actually think it might have more to do with the phrasing. I'm very used to "hey how are you doing" or "you okay?" and the likes.
The important part is that I, and I think most Americans, are used to hearing it as a passive question, with the way your feeling being the last part of the statement.
Hearing "alright dude" randomly would leave me absolutely stumped because even if you have a questioning inflection in your voice, that word combination means "you just did/said something that warranted a sarcastic affirmation" to me
Def sounds like context. If someone lobs a “you okay”? I take more concern but I can dig it. Different strokes for dif folks
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We should follow the Lithuanian form of greeting your coworkers: walk into the room without making eye-contact and sit impassively at your desk.
If anyone tries to convince you that the day is "good", nod gruffly.
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For me, I find this happens:
"Hi, did you find everything ok?"
"Good".
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Good. That'll teach them not to ask such deep questions of a stranger. If they want to get all personal with someone who doesn't know them, they should face consequences.
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I actually think it might have more to do with the phrasing. I'm very used to "hey how are you doing" or "you okay?" and the likes.
The important part is that I, and I think most Americans, are used to hearing it as a passive question, with the way your feeling being the last part of the statement.
Hearing "alright dude" randomly would leave me absolutely stumped because even if you have a questioning inflection in your voice, that word combination means "you just did/said something that warranted a sarcastic affirmation" to me
Ah yes, I had forgotten the basics of the internet here! You're absolutely right, inflections matter - and that's absolutely what's probably causing the confusion.
I generally greet with an upward inflection, generally found in questions and essential in most Latin languages.
It does throw people. Generally resolved with a bit of friendly politeness and writing it off to the accent.
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Man that's all super cool. Sounds like you're having a rough time of it - but as with most things, "this too shall pass".
That said, if you've taken the time to answer me, then I'm not going to handwave your issues away with a soundbite. Looking inwards is a tough skill, and I don't want anyone to feel that nobody's listening. Your cat for example, I was never a pet person until I started keeping rodents. I used to look at things from a purely financial point of view, where if the cost of treatment was greater than the value of the cat, then it was goodnight time. Now, having had pets large and small, my view on it has changed. I'd have fought the fuckin' world for my £12 hamster on his last days, but I was fortunate to have had the hamster make the decision for me.
If the vets have run out of ideas, then that sucks. Vets are some of the most compassionate people I know (not that my contact list is awash with them), but I'd trust them if they're shrugging their shoulders. I hope the cat comes round though, and if it doesn't, then you give it the best fuckin' time it has left.
Self employment is a tough one. Firstly, congrats on running your own business - that takes balls and a lot of personal and professional management skills. I've run a small area of a business before and it made my head spin. It was almost a breath of fresh air when I handed it on to someone else and went back to salaried employment, like a massive weight off my shoulders. Sure, you get to ride the waves of the good times and high demand... but the tough times are even tougher without a guaranteed income. I understand bro. I hope it picks up for you.
As for your mental health, stay on your feet and look beyond what's happening now. Everyone's depression is different and I'm not going to insult you by giving you a cookie cutter answer. I'm wary of adding to your workload too, but I've found running or swimming to give me the time to think about shit and get my head in order while doing some good to myself; going out for a coffee and people watching from a place with a nice view, to put my own issues into perspective and try and manage them in terms of scale; or even taking on a short course in something random like a language, crochet, or soldering - something to give you a random distraction each week.
Either way, I'm thrilled that you're here and that you're speaking. I hope you and your cat find a path into tomorrow, then next week, then next month, and beyond. I'm happy you talked about yourself, which is something we as a collective don't often do - so that's awesome of you.
Take care, and I wish you the best dude.
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For me, I find this happens:
"Hi, did you find everything ok?"
"Good".
I usually just updog.
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For me, I find this happens:
"Hi, did you find everything ok?"
"Good".
"Thank you, come again!"
"You too!"
🤮
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Man that's all super cool. Sounds like you're having a rough time of it - but as with most things, "this too shall pass".
That said, if you've taken the time to answer me, then I'm not going to handwave your issues away with a soundbite. Looking inwards is a tough skill, and I don't want anyone to feel that nobody's listening. Your cat for example, I was never a pet person until I started keeping rodents. I used to look at things from a purely financial point of view, where if the cost of treatment was greater than the value of the cat, then it was goodnight time. Now, having had pets large and small, my view on it has changed. I'd have fought the fuckin' world for my £12 hamster on his last days, but I was fortunate to have had the hamster make the decision for me.
If the vets have run out of ideas, then that sucks. Vets are some of the most compassionate people I know (not that my contact list is awash with them), but I'd trust them if they're shrugging their shoulders. I hope the cat comes round though, and if it doesn't, then you give it the best fuckin' time it has left.
Self employment is a tough one. Firstly, congrats on running your own business - that takes balls and a lot of personal and professional management skills. I've run a small area of a business before and it made my head spin. It was almost a breath of fresh air when I handed it on to someone else and went back to salaried employment, like a massive weight off my shoulders. Sure, you get to ride the waves of the good times and high demand... but the tough times are even tougher without a guaranteed income. I understand bro. I hope it picks up for you.
As for your mental health, stay on your feet and look beyond what's happening now. Everyone's depression is different and I'm not going to insult you by giving you a cookie cutter answer. I'm wary of adding to your workload too, but I've found running or swimming to give me the time to think about shit and get my head in order while doing some good to myself; going out for a coffee and people watching from a place with a nice view, to put my own issues into perspective and try and manage them in terms of scale; or even taking on a short course in something random like a language, crochet, or soldering - something to give you a random distraction each week.
Either way, I'm thrilled that you're here and that you're speaking. I hope you and your cat find a path into tomorrow, then next week, then next month, and beyond. I'm happy you talked about yourself, which is something we as a collective don't often do - so that's awesome of you.
Take care, and I wish you the best dude.
Thank you very much for that personal answer!
I was kinda afraid people would come back with the typical life lesson bullshit, on how I can turn everything around.
Your answer was really unexpected and I very much appreciate it :-)
I know, that I'll survive that time and my cat is doing his best as well.
Sadly not much more that I can do for him, but try to find the right food and juggle the additives, so he is able to eat a bit.
But he mostly isn't complaining and happily jumps on the couch to us to cuddle.
And as long as he shows us this happiness, we will fight on - together.Thank you very much again!
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I usually just updog.
What’s updog?
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I usually just updog.
When is up dog?
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We should follow the Lithuanian form of greeting your coworkers: walk into the room without making eye-contact and sit impassively at your desk.
If anyone tries to convince you that the day is "good", nod gruffly.
I'm sold. Gonna move to Lithuania post haste.
