I need this framed in every room so I don't make that mistake again

[cm0002@lemmy.world]

And do not park in or near the driveway, you will get blocked in then you'll have to spend half an hour (at best) finding random people and having them move their car so you can leave

[cm0002@lemmy.world]

Caution, this only works reliably with parents with younger kids, the older their youngest the less this works lol

[cannibalkitteh@lemmy.blahaj.zone]

I dunno, teens and adult children can be fussy too.

[nougat@fedia.io]

No matter where I am, I always have a sketch in my head as to what "leaving" would be like. How long it would take in total, then for each leg:

• Stand up
• Pick up coat
• "Welp."
• Put on coat
• Walk to door
• Open door
• Make one last witty comment before closing door behind me
• Walk to car
• Open car door
• Sit down
• Foot on brake
• Turn key to START
• When engine is running, release ignition key to ON position
• Seatbelt
• Steering wheel
• click Reverse
• Release brake
• Rear view while backing up
• Steer onto street
• Apply brake
• click click Drive
• GO

This is obviously different if I'm somewhere where I have not taken my own car and have to depend on alternate transportation, whether that be:

• Public transit
• Catch a ride with someone else
• Rideshare/taxi
• Walking
• Rental bike/e-bike/e-scooter
• Canal boat
• Slip-N-Slide
• Pneumatic tube
• Quantum tunnelling
• Window
• Magic[k]
• Hiding until everyone else leaves
• Go to sleep

[nougat@fedia.io]

I'm 54, and I'm fussy.

[possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip]

Leave without saying a word to anyone

[greatalbatross@feddit.uk]

It also gives you a retreat space if you'd like to stay, but want half an hour to yourself midway through.

[sarge@startrek.website]

"It was great seeing you again"

"but... You just got here five minutes ago"

"SO great..."

[sarge@startrek.website]

I've got a pretty nice system.

1: PANIC

B- Go

You may notice there's no conversation before the final step. This is because my anxiety doesn't allow me much talking until I can decompress.

It's worked so far.

[sarge@startrek.website]

My family usually get an "okay I'm gonna go now. I'll see you later" and that's about it.

But by then they can tell I've had enough of people today and want to leave so they're never surprised.

And if anyone wants to think I left because they arrived, so be it. I am not the shepherd of my family's emotions.

I can't just leave without saying anything though. Not unless they pissed me off.

[apotheotic@beehaw.org]

Public transport is nice too "ah sorry I've gotta catch my bus, it was lovely to see you bye!"

[errer@lemmy.world]

“I have massive diarrhea, gotta run!”

[zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev]

Just say you gotta shit then leave without saying goodbye to anybody.

[sirico@feddit.uk]

Bring snacks secret ones.

[kusimulkku@lemm.ee]

I guess I'm lucky since I enjoy spending time with my family and haven't had to consider things like in op

[dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world]

This is the mid-to-final stage in the family trauma galaxy-brain meme:

1. I'm screwed up, and it's my fault
2. I'm screwed up and it's my family's fault
3. My family screwed me up because they're also screwed up
4. My family screwed itself up, from long before I was born
5. If I stick around, I'm gonna get more screwed up

---

Also, if you look around and think about it, you may be able to identify which family members are practicing limited/no contact. They may be screwed up too, but at least they're aware of it.

[dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world]

Protip: do this but do NOT bring a whiskey flask or edibles. Yeah, it may take the edge off, but you may need your wits about you.

[dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world]

Way ahead of you: they can't even see my car from the house. This way, it's possible to vanish long before anyone figures it out.

[techt@lemmy.world]

The edibles are for when you have to stay the night ️

[bobs_monkey@lemm.ee]

Ah sweet, so I can stare at the ceiling until 3am when I hit the bed 4 hours prior