Just curious here. As an adult, how frequently do you admit you're wrong, back off, regroup, apologize, and earnestly try to make amends?
Do you think this varies by demographics? I'm thinking race here, but also ability, age, economic class, etc, probably play a part.
Also, answering again for yourself, how much do you associate those behaviors with shame? Are they easier for you to do in private? Do you know what differentiates a good apology from a bad one? Have you had any training or education in escalation, moderation, active listening, and other related skills? Or even in how to apologize or make amends? I'm not only talking about AA here but it's certainly one context where you might get that training/education.